The This Week in Doucheyness Edition

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This week: KONEY 2012, our St. Paddy’s Day Riot and the disappointment that is me. Still, I rail against cynicism. I’m paradoxical.

See the new cover of The Dangerous Kind at ChazzWrites.com. Got some feedback? Email me at expartepress@gmail.com.

 

 

 

 

 

Shoutouts to Eden Baylee, Tony at mahtwocents.com and donate to help a kid fight leukaemia at indiesuniteforjoshua.

If you love the podcast or the books, please leave a happy review on iTunes, Amazon, Smashwords, bathroom walls, get a tattoo…whatever. Thanks!

PODCAST: The Hawaii Five-O Edition

Learn German from Hogan’s Heroes, worship Steve McGarrett and beat up bad children if they don’t belong to you. In this week’s edition of the Self-help for Stoners podcast, Chazz takes a trip down trip down memory lane and finds a lot of macho bullshit on his shoes.

BONUS: Read my funny interview with RaeBeth McGee at The Writing World.

Like the podcast? Please leave your happy reviews at iTunes. Rabid with love for

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Chazz…or at least ready to encourage him to work more on stuff he’s actually good at? Go here and check out his books for sale: Amazon Link and Smashwords Link. (No matter your device, his dark fiction and chilling suspense are everywhere!)

You can donate to the IndieGoGo campaign to help Joshua fight cancer at this link. Interested in the Jeff Bennington books I mentioned on the podcast? Learn more at The Writing Bomb. Join Stitcher Radio here and use the promo code SELFHELPSTONERS for a chance at a $100 cash card.

Enjoy and thanks for listening and reading!

PODCAST: The Buckle Up & Brace Yourself Edition

God, door-to-door solicitors & Skylanders disappoint me. Clowns are under your bed. In this ranty, surreal, zero-segue romp across your brain, I’m off the Quaaludes and into the ditch. This is going to be my roughest ride yet. Bring your chair to the full upright position. Buckle up. Brace for impact in this Not Safe for Work podcast.

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Want to know more? Check out my books at the author site.

Meet my monkey ninjas at Amazon.

Grab the Stitcher app and enter the promo code SELFHELPSTONERS through this link.

Please pick up my short stories here! 

Buy the Self-help for Stoners paperback through my e-store.

Donate to the #IndiesUniteforJoshua campaign here to help a family and fight cancer.

Are you an indie author? Follow the writing and publishing blog that helps you market your ebooks: ChazzWrites.com.

Thanks for listening. If you like the books and podcasts, please tell a friend and leave happy reviews on iTunes, Amazon, Smashwords or wherever you found my stuff for sale. It helps. You can even buy me a coffee with the handy yellow donate button down the left hand side and I will honor you in the Hall of Champions in Valhalla. Cheers!

~ Chazz

PODCAST: The Forays in Self-consciousness Edition

A starving of artists and a choking of friendships: things are going to get weird. This week I also worry about trying not to bother Joe Rogan too much while still campaigning to get comedian Mike Schmidt (from the 40 Year Old Boy podcast) on The Joe Rogan Experience podcast. I also update you on the #IndiesUniteforJoshua campaign. To donate, please go here and get perks for your generosity!

Check out my page at Quotations Diary! It’s fun. No, really it is! Much more fun than this monotone, deep and despairing podcast in which I talk to myself for 40 minutes or so. I should really write more and talk less. God, I hate myself. Also? Kind of self-conscious. But listen to the podcast and I’ll explain.

I also have my new author page at Amazon’s Author Central in which I reveal the truth of my army of ninja assassins.

Your free weekly Self-help for Stoners podcast is available on iTunes, or you can download the Stitcher app for free and stream it to your device so you don’t have to hook up to your computer like an impoverished computer person from the 1990s. Cables are so last decade! Enter the promo code SELFHELPSTONERS here and bam! You’ll be entered into a draw to win a $100 cash card for the pleasure of joining Stitcher Radio.

To check out my books, you could go to Smashwords or Amazon or pretty much any digital book platform if you search for “Robert Chazz Chute.” That was easy. Want the printed, dead tree version of Self-help for Stoners featuring actual ink? Buy the paperback here.

Thanks for listening to my comedy/narrative podcast full of stuff and nonsense!

Podcast: The Death By Fire Edition

Kevin Smith highs and lows from me, The Big Fat Loser.

Spartan? Follow me @THECHAZZSAYS & I’ll lead the attack.

Love & rockets? expartepress at gmail dot com

Rave about the show on iTunes. Rant at your cat.

Leave happy book reviews on Amazon or Smashwords.

 

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Buy the books by Robert Chazz Chute. Or I shoot another hostage in the frenulum.
If you have pathetic writing aspirations, too, visit with me at ChazzWrites.com.

Are you still using a cable to download from iTunes and letting all that free entertainment take up room on your magic podcast listening device? That’s crazy talk! Download the Stitcher app for free and, when you enter the promo code SELFHELPSTONERS, you’ll be entered into the draw for a chance to win a $100 cash card!

Help a family fight cancer and get rewarded for your generosity with indie authors’ books and services!
Check out the IndieGoGo fundraiser for Joshua here.

Chazz Meets Kevin Smith & Jay Mewes

Podcast show notes and details 

In this NSFW, most serious episode of Self-help for Stoners ever, Meeting Kevin Smith & Jay Mewes:

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telling a bad leukemia joke in front of thousands, meeting my DIY hero, help a kid with leukemia (ironic, no?), weight loss tech, The Fight Club Test and I discuss how truly dangerous Joe Rogan is. This is the most serious of my podcasts ever! Almost lugubrious. However, if you’re at a crossroads, too, it might inspire you to change your life, too.

To see my video about How Kevin Smith Changed My Life, go to http://allthatchazz.com/book-reviews/

Check out the IndieGoGo fundraiser for Joshua at http://www.indiegogo.com/indiesuniteforjoshua.

Joshua is a very sick young man. He and his family need our help as they deal with heavy financial demands while his leukaemia is treated. For the charity drive (#IndiesUnited4Joshua), if you can’t contribute cash, please tweet and share to spread the word. If you can donate, bonus! You will get books or services in return! And may Thor bless your tender heart.

 Please follow me @THECHAZZSAYS.

 Want to stream podcasts easily with zero drain on your device’s storage space? Easy! Download the Stitcher app and use the promo code: SELFHELPSTONERS to enter a draw to win a $100 cash card.

 Get the Self-help for Stoners ebook or paperback here. Cheap!

Grab the short stories at Smashwords here. Couch change, baby!

 It’s time for us all to be Why Not? People. I mean…why not?

The My Bloody Throat Edition

 

Click here to go to some of my books. Or just listen to the podcast and get uncomfortably entertained.

Due to scary and ugly circumstances that shall be revealed, Chazz goes long, raw, uncut, unedited and au natural in this podcast that goes off the rails and maybe off a cliff. No music. Just me speaking directly into your head. Move over brain. This trip will get uncomfortable. 

In this episode of the Self-help for Stoners podcast, I talk about: going to see director Kevin Smith, my secret superhero origins and we confront the existential abyss together and giggle nervously. I read three excerpts from the book: two short self-help pieces and one long story called Context in which we…uh…well, it’s surprise.

You can listen here, of course, or on iTunes or on Stitcher. To enter a draw for a $100 cash card, download the Stitcher app from your app store and enter the promo code SELFHELPSTONERS. (Yeah, I know. They couldn’t give me a longer promo code without switching to Mandarin.) Stitcher’s great for streaming, though, because it takes up no room on your phone and you don’t have to go to the bother of hooking up to your computer with a cable like you’re Amish or something.