The paperback is out and yes, it’s BIGGER THAN JESUS! Note the endorsement from bestselling author Claude Bouchard! See the back cover, all designed by the great Kit Foster of KitFosterDesign.com!
Now in paperback! Click it to grab it for just $9.99.
The paperback is very much like the ebook…with a few changes to the text. If the ebook was everything you desired, but you prefer to have a book you can lick, then you too can own this book made of paper instead of pixels! (Strange, I know.) All for only $9.99! Order now and enjoy! And thus concludes this ad. Much celebration in the bunker this evening… Hey, kid. Pass the sacramental wine.
I’m writing more posts for readers instead of just writing for writers. I love you all, but I haven’t reached out to readers enough on AllThatChazz beyond the weekly podcasts. (If you’re a reader with questions, email at expartepress AT gmail DOT com or hit me up on Twitter @rchazzchute.)
As the Ronco hawkers used to say, “But wait there’s much more!”
If you look down the left hand side of the web page, you’ll also spot a ton of new links to stuff on Amazon, from books to the latest, coolest Amazon blogs, The Hot Deal of the Day, gift cards, Lightning Deals and a link so you can purchase an inexpensive e-reader.
Have I sold out and gone commercial? Gee, I hope so. A dude’s gotta eat. Every time you click one of those links and buy on Amazon, they send me a few crumbs, which, not for nothing, no other store is going to do, so being an Amazon Affiliate seems reasonable. I sell books that are read on free reading apps, but primarily on kindles. Naturally, I want people to buy more kindles so there’s an ad for how to get a cheap kindle.
To support art, this is what the marketplace looks like now. No apologies. Do I miss musty shops and the smell of pipe smoke as the proprietors, an elderly British couple, totter amid the towering stacks of books and make tea while I hunt for treasure in an ancient bookstore on a Sunday afternoon? Sure. I also miss the guy who used to deliver milk. Some people have problems with Amazon because they’re winning. Amazon dominates because they’re (usually) good at what they do. That’s what competition and capitalism are all about when it works, I guess.
I promote Amazon without hesitation because that’s one of the places I sell my
A gripping novella of murder and betrayal bundled with suspenseful short stories that will keep you up tonight. These are the foundation stories of the coming Poeticule Bay Series. New price: only $1.99!
books. I can’t afford a hissy fit about nostalgia. I’m a working writer. Sorry. In anticipating objections, I sound defensive about the new ads on the site. I doubt anyone really cares that, much — or at least no one who’s curious enough to click on a Lightning Deal or the Hot Deal of the Day.
I guess my answer is, the books are not only packed full of suspense and twists, they’re also super cheap and the podcasts stay fun and free. Amazon’s helping, so please give the links a click. Or even buy a book. Thanks.
I saw a preliminary draft of the cover to Higher Than Jesus today. Wow. It’s going to be great. My graphic designer, Kit Foster of KitFosterDesign.com, is a genius who read my mind on a couple of points about the cover. Playing art director is fun and Kit manages to cover up any trace of annoyance so maybe he really is that enthusiastic! He really is on a quest to make it perfect.
A couple of my notes from my email were:
The model is a “hooker hot” 7 and we need an “innocent-hot” 10, with peroxide blonde hair and bright red lipstick to catch the red in the title text. And is there such a thing as metallic red? I’m thinking of the kind of red that rich morons who buy really fast cars favor at midlife. Can we do that color?
There were many more demands about sexing up the cover. Oh, I’m terrible. Look for Higher Than Jesus in September. Get Bigger Than Jesus by clicking the cover below. The paperback is coming soon.
Please click it to grab the gripping, funny crime thriller by Robert Chazz Chute.
I have lots of cool announcements coming, but before I get to all that, I think it’s time I addressed some readers who are worried that my title, Bigger Than Jesus, is sacrilegious. I don’t think so. Here’s why:
1. Your “Gee-zuzz” is a Christian deity. The main character of my suspense novel is hispanic. His name is pronounced “Hay-soose.”
2. Jesus is a name and, not surprisingly, not that uncommon. Is the title designed to grab your attention? Sure. Will it tear apart the universe? Probably not.
3. The phrase “bigger than Jesus” paraphrases John Lennon’s remark about the popularity of a little band called The Beatles. I hope we’ve grown a little bit in tolerance since the late sixties and early seventies. Or does my mixed marriage offend you, too? (If so, go read the red letters in the Bible again. You’re doing it wrong.)
4. If you read the book, you’ll see that “bigger than jesus” actually emerges as a theme and a key to how the character views the world. (No spoilers here, but I can tell you that it’s not a cheap gimmick.)
5. Though the use of the phrase “bigger than Jesus” caused some transitory strife for The Beatles, I’m not worried the use of it as the title of my book will stop Paul and Ringo from getting together for a revivifying tour if they so choose.
6. I’m worried about the state of your faith. When you complain about my title, frankly, you sound weak. If your faith can be shaken by the title of a crime novel, you need to get yourself to church and do some soul-searching. No Christian soldier you.
7. Jesus Christ is not a weak concept. He’s is unthreatened, so why are you? Gee-zuzz is bigger than Hay-soose. Why worry about Gee-zuzz? Why not worry that you’re offending all those guys named Hay-soose by disenfranchising them from being named in fiction?
8. I didn’t name it “Bigger Than Jesus” to offend you. The main character does struggle with issues of faith because his prayers are so rarely answered. However, it’s not a Christian book. It’s also not an anti-religious rant. It’s a crime novel and very entertaining.
9. Some religious people do and say things that offend me. I don’t feel they owe me an explanation, though. I don’t go through life demanding that everyone change so we Nerf the world. That would be impractical at best and fascist at worst.
10. You can be pious, but that doesn’t mean you have to be humorless, irony-impaired and boring. Some religious people count among my best friends and they’re strong, joyful people who are not easily threatened. They read my book and they laugh and enjoy themselves.
In response to the easily offended, and to paraphrase Dennis Miller back when he was amusing:
“My God thinks I’m #!@$!! funny!”
Or are you just jealous because, if there is a heaven and I go there, Christ and I will have something to talk about? I hope so. I’m lousy at small talk.
Please click it to grab the gripping, funny crime thriller by Robert Chazz Chute.
As the entries to the Six Words of Less Contest rolled in, I was surprised how several tied in with religious themes. You can vote for your favorite entries by checking the comment thread and emailing your vote at:
expartepress AT gmail DOT com.
Some people have asked me why I called my crime novel Bigger Than Jesus? I make allusions to things that are, in fact, bigger than my Cuban hit man, both in jokes and in serious themes. The crux of the title is that it’s catchy and memorable, yes, but it complements the main character’s narrative of strife. Jesus (pronounced “Hay-soose”) has a lot of problems that he becomes equal to only by sheer cleverness and luck. Jesus Diaz is much like us in that way.
The theme that you’ll read through all The Hit Man Series is one of escape. Jesus Diaz desperately wants to find love and lost his past. The past just keeps coming after him, and love can be an elusive thing.
It’s my anniversary tomorrow. I married She Who Must be Obeyed fifteen years ago, so we’re going to try to take the day off. The lovely Eden Baylee has supplied a guest blog at ChazzWrites.com wherein we learn what sort of men turn her on and she tells us a little (not enough!) about her erotic fiction (Spring Into Summer). She teases us, so we’ll have to just go buy the book.
A gripping novella of murder and betrayal bundled with suspenseful short stories that will keep you up tonight. These are the foundation stories of the coming Poeticule Bay Series.
The podcast of the next chapter of Bigger Than Jesus won’t be up until Friday since I’m sworn to just write tomorrow and goof off with my queen, otherwise. However, quench your thirst for suspense with The Dangerous Kind & Other Stories. I‘ve switched it to a mere $1.99! Whoo-hoo!
I’m holding a contest that could get your name in my new thriller.
The follow-up to my crime novel, Bigger Than Jesus is called Higher Than Jesus and it’s coming this fall.
Here’s the challenge: My hit man passes a homeless person in the street and gives him some money. The homeless person wears a black hoodie. I want something catchy and memorable on that hoodie. I thought about making an inside joke and making it a Self-help for Stoners emblem (my first book). I considered using a meme that’s already out there but kind of hipster, like the inside joke from Portal: There is no cake.
But no, I’m calling on the readership!What’s the short, punchy, pithy, memorable phrase that should adorn that black hoodie on the homeless guyon a cold winter’s night in Chicago?It could be funny. It could be pointed and political. Let’s hear it!
Please click it to grab the gripping, funny crime thriller by Robert Chazz Chute.
What do you get for your contribution?
(Yes, there is metaphorical cake!)
The winner gets lots of that cake! There are five prizes. Go to this link for all the details and post your entries in the comments at that link (so all the entries are in one thread.) Thanks and have fun!
The Dangerous Kind & Other Storiesis now out in the world.
I wrote my novella, The Dangerous Kind, about small-town claustrophobia in Maine and the deadly contempt that familiarity can breed. Two brothers have just lost their father to an accident at the mill. They both want the insurance settlement and a hunting trip might yield an opportunity to solve problems with murder. Did I mention there are surprises? I love surprises, don’t you?
I’ve bundled The Dangerous Kind with the following SIX powerful short stories,
all precursors to the coming Poeticule Bay Series of novels:
I’ve dealt out deadly consequences to collections agents in the popular award winnerEnd of the Line (from Sex, Death & Mind Control). This time I deal with real world problems in different ways. InThe Sum of Me, an aspiring writer gets financial help that hurts. I gave a reading of this short story live at a writing convention (to thunderous applause) and it also won an honourable mention from Writer’s Digest. Everyone identified with the palpable writerly desperation.
What do you do when your psychotherapist dumps you? Read Vengeance is #1, about Georgie, a mean girl with bad timing. She’ll give you some tips on how to handle it. Please note: All her ideas are very bad. It reads like steroidal YA. Watch out for the sharp and dangerous mood swings.
You’re a serial killer. Your therapist is helping you to control your impulses. She only wants you to kill the lost causes of she chooses from her patient pool. Then someone comes along who you want to slay so badly you can almost taste the blood. What then? Then it’s mind game time! Take Corrective Measures.
In Over & Out, a wife abandons her husband and children. He tries to put up a brave front while quietly dying inside (maybe literally.) Then he discovers the power of hypochondria and how self-help is sometimes the opposite of real help. Psychological horror and revelations in a little neurotic cup!
In Asia Unbound, a starlet returns to Poeticule Bay for her uncle’s funeral. She meets up with her high school boyfriend, now Marcus in the Morning, your friendly and miserable radio DJ. Drinks are thrown back, mice are killed and awful secrets from the past are revealed. Your heart might bleed for them both, but you should really only feel sorry for one of them. Life’s a mystery you can solve and still get it all wrong.
In this strange follow-up to Asia Unbound, Marcus in the Morning is at work the next day using the power of his microphone to argue with God. In Parting Shots, Marcus is about to find out that there are some arguments you definitely do not want to win! A conundrum is drummed. Fatal deals are made. Hold on to your faith. You’re going to need it.
~ Robert Chazz Chute has won seven writing awards of vastly varying importance and was nominated for a Maggy Award for his columns. He is the author of the newly released (very funny and super twisty) crime novel Bigger Than Jesus. You might know him from Self-help for Stoners, meeting Kevin Smith and such industrial films as Hitting People in the Face with Ball Peen Hammers is Wrong (except in Texas) and Writing About Yourself in the Third Person for an Author Profile Sure Sounds Douchey, Doesn’t It? Please buy his books. Otherwise he cries and it’s hopelessly pathetic. Hopeless!
