I have lots of cool announcements coming, but before I get to all that, I think it’s time I addressed some readers who are worried that my title, Bigger Than Jesus, is sacrilegious. I don’t think so. Here’s why:

1. Your “Gee-zuzz” is a Christian deity. The main character of my suspense novel is hispanic. His name is pronounced “Hay-soose.”

2. Jesus is a name and, not surprisingly, not that uncommon. Is the title designed to grab your attention? Sure. Will it tear apart the universe? Probably not.

3. The phrase “bigger than Jesus” paraphrases John Lennon’s remark about the popularity of a little band called The Beatles. I hope we’ve grown a little bit in tolerance since the late sixties and early seventies. Or does my mixed marriage offend you, too? (If so, go read the red letters in the Bible again. You’re doing it wrong.)

4. If you read the book, you’ll see that “bigger than jesus” actually emerges as a theme and a key to how the character views the world. (No spoilers here, but I can tell you that it’s not a cheap gimmick.)

5. Though the use of the phrase “bigger than Jesus” caused some transitory strife for The Beatles, I’m not worried the use of it as the title of my book will stop Paul and Ringo from getting together for a revivifying tour if they so choose.

6. I’m worried about the state of your faith. When you complain about my title, frankly, you sound weak. If your faith can be shaken by the title of a crime novel, you need to get yourself to church and do some soul-searching. No Christian soldier you.

7. Jesus Christ is not a weak concept. He’s is unthreatened, so why are you? Gee-zuzz is bigger than Hay-soose. Why worry about Gee-zuzz? Why not worry that you’re offending all those guys named Hay-soose by disenfranchising them from being named in fiction?

8. I didn’t name it “Bigger Than Jesus” to offend you. The main character does struggle with issues of faith because his prayers are so rarely answered. However, it’s not a Christian book. It’s also not an anti-religious rant. It’s a crime novel and very entertaining.

9. Some religious people do and say things that offend me. I don’t feel they owe me an explanation, though. I don’t go through life demanding that everyone change so we Nerf the world. That would be impractical at best and fascist at worst.

10. You can be pious, but that doesn’t mean you have to be humorless, irony-impaired and boring. Some  religious people count among my best friends and they’re strong, joyful people who are not easily threatened. They read my book and they laugh and enjoy themselves.

In response to the easily offended, and to paraphrase Dennis Miller back when he was amusing:

“My God thinks I’m #!@$!! funny!”

Or are you just jealous because, if there is a heaven and I go there, Christ and I will have something to talk about? I hope so. I’m lousy at small talk.