She Who Must Be Obeyed (AKA my wife) mentioned that the new move in appropriate terminology is to encourage physical distancing, not social distancing.
With COVID-19 rampaging across Earth, isolating is necessary. However, you need not feel alone. All in this together even if we’re apart, right? Some experts suggest reaching out to three people a day (electronically). Give a call to someone you haven’t spoken to in a while. Check in, especially with the elderly, vulnerable neighbors or family members who are stuck, alone or at risk. Alone doesn’t have to be lonely. Making and maintaining social connections has even been shown to be good for our health. Stress and strife is something we need to tamp down as much as we can.
Don’t know what to say to people going through hard times? Often, all you need do is listen so they feel heard and seen. Other times, you may be able to help people at risk connect to services that can assist them.
Speaking of Reaching Out
Did you know that avid readers of my work have a private Facebook group where I hold forth on the doings of the day? It’s often jokes and occasionally it’s serious. I add excerpts from my work in progress, too.
Example? Here’s a snippet from the This Plague of Days prequel I’m working on now:Â
Armed only with the cane, Moira rushed toward the screams. She was still weak, but now that she’d survived the Sutr flu, she was determined to fight whatever came next. She did not spare a moment to tell Kevin Laughlin that she would return to his side. The dying have no time for lies.
For another taste from the group, here’s today’s post (a review of sorts):Â
Hey, Monday, you great looming beast full of threats, coffin nails, and bat wings. And hello, friends.
When we ran out of our addictive Tiger King supply, we watched Wild Wild Country on Netflix. Again, I am amazed at the sheer amount of footage narcissists require. If you know someone who records everything, there’s a good chance they killed somebody or they’re about to do something super shady that should land them in a prison cell.
Wild Wild Country has been out for a while. I’d given it a miss, but it is so watchable after you slog through the first episode. It’s about a cult that started out with high hopes. Then god complexes, bigotry, and government corruption get in the way. A utopian vision in rural Oregon slides from peace and love to AK-47s. It’s disappointing and teaches us a lesson we should have learned a long time ago: Don’t trust the feds.
There is so much fascinating nuance in these tales of downward spirals. I don’t watch a lot of true crime. I imagine that if you binge too much of it, it’s difficult to see the good in humanity. I know I often sound like a cynic, but they say every cynic is a disappointed idealist.
If you dig what I do, this is your invitation to join our happy little group of readers.
Last night I dreamt that I met an old enemy at a restaurant. He was with his family. I sat beside them but he refused to acknowledge me. I took him aside and said, “I forgive you.”
Wow, that sure pissed him off. “What? What did you say to me?”
I replied, “Have you ever danced with the Devil in the pale moonlight?”
His rage was very satisfying.
I woke up thinking about forgiveness.
Have I ever forgotten a single offense? No. That’s the burden of possessing an eidetic memory for every negative event. I don’t know how to rewire my brain to make my opponents feel more comfortable. I don’t want to forget so I guess forgiveness is out, too. I let myself off the hook of that common social obligation. (I call it learning.)
We often call for victims to forgive their enemies. Says so in the Bible, too. However, that frequently serves the oppressor more than the oppressed. Offenders try to take a shortcut to salvation. Offering neither apologies nor recompense, they expect absolution. They place the burden of “moving on” where it does not belong. A consequence-free existence increases the chances they will offend again.
I will never demand that anyone forgive transgressions in the name of becoming more healthy. That’s up to each individual to decide for themselves.
My daughter works in a bank and deals mostly with an older population. Many express annoyance at her bank’s new safety precautions and even tell her the COVID-19 pandemic is a hoax! Still! It got me thinking about what is and what’s to come. I hope these bold predictions are wrong, but here are my thoughts.
Warning: No guarantees on any predictions, no refunds for butthurt.
The ConflictÂ
Hope: Everything works out better than epidemiologists expect and we’ll recover quickly. Prediction #1: Before this is over, everyone will know someone who perished because of COVID-19. Prediction #2: When the pandemic recedes, God will get the glory, not the scientists who come up with the vaccine. Though a few outliers will still roll the dice on herd immunity, most anti-vaxxers will go curiously silent for a while as they line up for the shot.
Corruption
Observation: People with a lot of money, power, and influence got a heads-up about how bad this would be and dumped their stocks for profit while they told us everything was peachy. Prediction#1: They will never be punished. Prediction #2: Those in power will tell us to forget it and stop living in the past. Many people with no power will shrug it off and let it go because (a) they’re worshipful of successful sociopaths, (b) hope to become successful sociopaths, or (c) are too busy trying to put food on the table to concern themselves with what feels too far beyond their control.
We’ve been gaslit.
Hope: This crisis will challenge us to reform our healthcare systems so universal healthcare is accepted everywhere. We’ve been fighting the wrong wars. Illnesses of all kinds are definitely coming for you. Terrorists? Far less so. Prediction: Since some countries with universal healthcare suffered badly during the pandemic for reasons unrelated to offering universal healthcare, the United States will continue without Medicare for all. Parallel: “We can’t have evil socialism because of Venezuela.” It would make more sense to say, “We can expand our mixed economy to include altruistic socialist values because no one loses their home to medical debt in all other First World nations. We don’t have pure capitalism but even if we did, that model alone doesn’t succeed at everything it’s supposed to do.”
Where the Money Goes
Hope: Cruise ships are recognized for the Petri dishes they are and would-be passengers will fear they’ll be trapped on them. These gigantic ships will become symbols of a bygone era, like airships. Prediction #1: Attempts will be made to save the cruise ship industry and millions of dollars that could have been funneled to better causes will go to companies that don’t even pay taxes in the U.S. Prediction #2: Sure, they’re fun, but the cruise ship industry will still fail because so few people will be able to afford that fun vacation during the Depression.
The Economy
Prediction 1: Oh, did I not mention a Depression? The very rich will stay rich and get richer by buying up depleted assets at a low price. The middle class will shrink even further. Prediction #2: If Trump loses, it will take a generation to go back to systemic norms. Prediction #3: If Trump wins, it will take two generations for the United States to recover, if they do. Prediction #4: As the pendulum swings back and the revolution comes, Bernie will be long gone. AOC will lead the new charge. Half of America will still push back, at least until they receive universal health care. Eventually, privately and among close friends, even those opposed will admit universal care costs less, has better outcomes for more people and no one need suffer medical bankruptcy. They’ll be glad they don’t have to fight with an insurance company and pay exorbitant premiums and copays to receive the care they need. (No worries, though. They can still hate the people who fought for them for other reasons.)
The 2020 Election
Curse: Donald Trump will take reelection (not win reelection) through a combination of gerrymandering, Russian assistance, voter suppression, suppression of voter turnout via fear of the pandemic, COVID-19 suppression of the Democratic Party’s campaign, media failures and Joe Biden’s inability to reach and win over voters from the Trump cult. Prediction: Everyone but those responsible will be blamed and shamed. We’ll be saying, “If we had all just had mail-in ballots and if we had used them…”
Our Screens
Prediction #1: Vido game industry? Wheeeeeeeee! Prediction #2: Hollywood? Shit.
Learned Helplessness
Prediction #1: Too many will break isolation too soon. Instead of shutting everything down for a whole year plus, there will be rolling lockdowns. Prediction #2: Despair goes up. Suicides go up. No one without power ever trusts the system again. Prediction #3: After 2016, many people were inspired to become politically active. With the next election failure, that hope for change will be squashed. Many will give up and retreat from that battlefield to focus on family, community, and distractions. The motto of learned helplessness is “They’re gonna do what they’re gonna do.”
The Business Spiral
Prediction #1: Though many will be sacrificed in the name of bringing back the economy, the stock market will not bounce back because the economy is still working on the same premise. The stock market is largely irrelevant to most working people. People may go back to work but they’ll spend less, travel less, go out less. We will withdraw monetarily and socially. Prediction #2: Many movie theaters, comedy clubs, and arenas will not survive 2020. Enough people will stay away for fear of contagion that business models that rely on public gatherings will fail. Streaming services will survive but will produce less content. We’ll continue to see the world through the lens of our phones: disappointment, anger, and sadness. Trust on the macro and micro scale will plummet as many follow the leader on the swing toward an “every person for themselves” mentality.
The Cull and the Exodus
Prediction #1: Far more people will die because of COVID-19 than might have, had the world been better prepared. Prioritizing military and geopolitical objectives over science, we’ve been fighting the wrong war. Prediction #2: Many people will die because they will avoid hospitals and doctors’ offices for the next year or more. Prediction #3: Feeling abandoned, suffering PTSD, and angry, some doctors and nurses will leave the profession. Prediction #4: Fewer people will opt to enter the health profession. We will all suffer for it.
The Cultural Shift
Prediction #1: In the United States, the economy will be prioritized over lives in the name of long-term thinking and pragmatism. It’s actually cruel short-term thinking. All those dead grandparents still won’t save the economy. Prediction #2: I hope you like your house and where you live because you won’t be able to sell it for a very long time. I sincerely hope you don’t lose it. Homeownership will slide further out of reach of younger generations. We will become nations of renters to fewer and fewer landlords. Prediction #3: A new era of urban hippie will be born where people plant gardens to ensure they’ll have food when they need it. This movement will not convey the excitement of the doomer and prepper fringe because, having survived the pandemic, everyone will appreciate how grim the apocalypse is. This new group will focus on pragmatism and food security rather than more guns and escapist glee. Prediction #4: A smaller group will embrace back-to-the-land isolation where they leave the cities and attempt to form communes. Most of the communes will fail as they’ve failed before. Some individuals who would otherwise become urban accountants will end up in remote locations in cedar A-frames chopping their own wood. Prediction #5: Continuing to “shelter at home” will have an impact on jobs and daily routines. With trust in the healthcare falling and comorbidities adding to the death tally from COVID-19, expect a renewed focus on clean eating and fitness. It won’t be for vanity but for longevity and the ability to carry heavy things. We’ll be too afraid to return to the gym at first. Then we won’t be able to afford a gym. We’ll work out more where we live, clean more and strive to be less susceptible to disease. We will own fewer things and have less to dust, take up less square footage and drive less. Prediction #6: Handshakes are dead. Physical distancing will continue as social ties get closer through electronic media. When kids are asked what they want to be when they grow up, part of their calculation will be the goal of working safely from home instead of working with the public.
Moods by Generation
Prediction #1: Got young kids? If you can buy stock in hand sanitizer, that’s a good bet for now and for the rest of our lives. We’re growing a generation of germaphobes. Prediction #2: Older people aren’t the only ones who will die or suffer lasting effects of this pandemic. The elderly will be more financially insecure, food insecure and lonely.
The Next Pandemic Emergency
Prediction #1: Everyone will say that COVID-19 will change everything, but historically our collective memory is short. By the end of 2021, once all the COVID memorials are done, we’ll be told this pandemic was a blip. We will forget these harsh lessons about our fragile supply chains. Prediction #2: Eagerness will trump caution. The desire to rush everything back to normal too quickly will prolong the crisis. Despite terrible outcomes, we will not be prepared for the next pandemic. Prediction #3: “Back to normal” will continue to keep more of us in the category of what sociologists call “at risk.”
The Legacy of DJT
Prediction #1: Donald J. Trump has ruined the use of the word trump. It brings up the image of the noun, not the verb. Prediction #2: Donald J. Trump has devalued the esteem for the office of POTUS. That’s not all bad. The office of President has received too much reverence, anyway. In Canada, we say, “the prime minister.” In America, many citizens say, “my president.” See how that subtly shifts the tone? Canadians are generally less attached to the goobers in office, possibly because our election cycles are done in a month instead of dragging on for years, grinding into our collective psyche.
Your Reaction
Prediction #1: Somebody will hate me for indulging in the “Orange Man bad” narrative. If that’s you, I won’t hate you back, but I will ask you to check back in four years and tell me how you feel then, assuming either of us survive, of course. Prediction #2: Optimists will also be annoyed with this post. Maybe that will make cynics feel good. I take no joy in any of this. I want the economy to bounce back and for everybody to be well and happy. Observation: Things won’t improve for average working people until we all prioritize making things better for them. Although anyone reading this post is closer to becoming homeless than they are to becoming wealthy, many lack the political will to face these challenges head-on.
Suggestions and Solutions?
Hey, man. I see what I see but to change it? I don’t know. Can empathy be taught? I just write science fiction. How much do I know for sure? Not much. I’m an educated fool with few practical skills. All I can say is:
1. Elections have consequences. Choose carefully. Overcome my dire predictions to remain engaged.
2. Believe science. Encourage improved education and steer more young people toward the sciences, logic, and healthy skepticism.
3. Cynicism only sounds smart. Misanthropy is often funny. However, these are not effective survival strategies. Humans are social animals and we need each other (socially, economically, every damn way.) We wouldn’t have climbed down from the trees and evolved without collective action for the common good. The winner-takes-all attitude creates to many losers and is unsustainable. Try kindness.
4. Many have forgotten our lessons from kindergarten. We are here to help each other, to learn, to have fun, to live.
Last night I spotted a terrifying tweet from an ER doctor in New York. His hospital was slammed with patients. They intubated five patients on his shift. Four lived. Some nurses retreated to closets to weep. This is life and death on the front lines and this is only the beginning. There are not enough masks to protect health care workers. Exhausted and feeling hopeless, the doctor’s take on the chaos and the lack of viable treatment options: “You’re all on your own.”
If you can stay home, please do so. Isolating saves lives.
A. Gilligan’s Island. B. In orbit on the ISS. C. It’s the plot of the Martian and you’re Matt Damon.
Mars would be optimal but for the loneliness. The International Space Station has a lovely view. If you live with a Gilligan who’s always screwing everything up for everybody, you’re going to have to tie up your little buddy and spray him with Lysol three times a day.
Okay, cool. We’re stuck. How do you plan to use this time and stay sane?
For many of us, it’s been about a week or so in isolation.Â
I write books for a living. My struggle kicked in before the coronavirus arrived on our shores. For the last three months, I’ve been having a hard time getting into my job. I love writing once I start, but, ooh, it can be hard to start. As Stephen King says, “The scariest part is right before you start.”
I have a book about two-thirds written and several other projects that need attention. After publishing Citizen Second Class on Christmas Day, I fell into a kaleidoscope of distractions, working on marketing plans, developing book plots and proposals, goofing off a little, and entertaining a killer funk. Funks are not fun. I need to focus. Maybe you feel it, too? Are the walls closing in? Let’s figure this shit out.
We’re in isolation and creeping dread has set in. What’s next?
After this experience, I hope we all develop more compassion for prisoners, especially those in solitary. If you live alone, you can be quite safe from the coronavirus. However, isolation takes its own toll.
When you go to prison, you can go one of two ways: work out with heavy weights and get huge or sleep sixteen hours a day. As a chronic insomniac, I’ve found it quite easy to sleep lately. I especially enjoy those delicious afternoon naps. Nothing wrong with napping unless it’s a sign of depression stealing into your life. If it’s a retreat you need, I advocate for it. If you’re sleeping so much that it’s messing with your plans and relationships, you might want to reevaluate. I know I am.
Rob’s plan to shake off the funk:
Stay informed, not overwhelmed. Information is good. Tragedy tourism through the internet is harmful.
Structure. What’s the plan for the day? Set alarms. Do the Thing!
I try not to waste time obsessing about the things I can’t control.
My favorite playlist is called Deadly. It’s my “Get up and go beat ’em up workout music.” Better that than yet another podcast that beats me over the head with the same information over and over.
Move more. I don’t want to go near my doctor’s office for the next year if I can help it. Exercise is my new medical appointment and it has to happen daily.Â
Stop with the stress eating. More veggies, water, and less processed crap.
Stay connected with the social circle. Humans are social animals. Yes, even most introverts need some human interaction. Talking to yourself and to pets is okay but a little more feedback than an echo off the bare walls is nice.
Dance. Sing. Swear.Â
Acknowledge that striving for excellence doesn’t require perfection. Perfectionism is a form of self-loathing. We don’t have to teach our kids quantity surveying and particle physics just because they’re out of school.
We’re at a huge historical milestone. We will all remember this time. Maintain morale whenever possible. Make jokes. Share fun memes of dogs doing fun dog stuff.
Patience.
Kindness.
Distractions can helpful when they don’t fill the entire day. Sure, watch Netflix but don’t scroll through it aimlessly for hours.Â
Work on your hobbies, play some games.
Read those books you’ve been meaning to read. (If you’re reading mine and you like them, please review them. Thanks!)
Got clutter? You know what to do. Sure, it’s not necessarily fun but, like exercise, you’ll feel better and lighter afterward. Bonus: You’ll find that thing you thought you lost!
Reach out electronically. Call somebody you haven’t spoken to in a long time. Tell Dad you’re the one who put a dent in his car that time. It’s not like he can come over and take a swing at you. (Or tell him you love him. That’ll freak him out.)
You’re already washing your hands obsessively. Good! Don’t skip showering the rest of you each day, too.
Wash your clothes. You can’t get a haircut, but keep up appearances.Â
Helping others will help you.
Acknowledge that it’s okay to feel bad, to stress, to get mad. I will try to stick to these plans, but I will not beat myself up when I fail to hit a home run for every at-bat. Find the balance.
Watch out for binge drinking, binge eating, binge drugging etc. Get those harmful lures out of your home and get help if you need it.
I didn’t realize how much I depended on the routine of writing in a coffee shop until the coffee shop was no longer an option. My appointment with my laptop is every morning at 10 a.m.
Not all suggestions are for everyone all the time. Do what you can with what you have. Stay as safe as you can.Â
Check in with anyone you suspect may be at risk of self-harm or harm by others.
We are all doing hard time. If you need help, there are still resources available to you. If that’s you, please try to be brave for just one more minute and call a friend or an agency that will offer assistance. Contemplating self-harm? Google “International Suicide Hotline.” Suffering domestic violence? Get help here: https://www.domesticshelters.org/. Whatever your mental health issue, make the call. There is an organization filled with good people eager to support you. You are needed. Hold on!
If you are an essential worker who doesn’t have the option of isolating at home, you get to swear more than the rest of us. Godspeed and feel our love for you because you are a goddamn hero. We all salute and thank you. When we get through this, it will be a big party and you’ll be the guest of honor. Hold on!
Whoever and wherever you are, hold on.
(Got a suggestion of your own? Please, add them in the comments.)
Two ambulances paid a visit to neighbors in the little cul-de-sac across from my house last night. No cops, no lights, no sirens. I hope it’s not COVID-related, but with 500,000 Ontarians returning from March Break this weekend, I would not be shocked. We had a few fun plans for the break: a college tour for my son, one night away, a movie and sugar bush*. It was nothing involving palm trees and faraway places, but we canceled everything. I’m glad we did.
Canada’s health minister has declared that social distancing is not a “two-week thing.” Many haven’t wrapped their brains around this fact yet. This pandemic will stretch on for a long time and we dare not relax our vigilance. We already knew that, really. I suspect some people would freak out if we admitted the restrictions will continue until we receive the vaccine. That’s well over a year away and there are other negative effects besides the threat of COVID-19: social isolation, domestic abuse, child abuse, depression, anxiety, paranoia, crushing poverty, a dead world economy, etc.,…
The coronavirus has demonstrated conclusively that society and the world economy is a fragile model for civilization. As a writer of apocalyptic tales, I always knew this, but I never wanted to live like this beyond the realm of fiction. Unlike other zombie apocalypse stories, Season One of This Plague of Days details how civilization slowly falls apart before the evolution of the virus. The similarities are a little eerie.
One of the variables that is making the pandemic worse is the number of people who are failing to isolate themselves. The health minister clarified that our civil liberties are at stake. If we can’t isolate ourselves for the good of the whole, the government will impose sanctions. It’s been a long time since Pierre Trudeau imposed the War Measures Act. It will be odd when his son imposes the 2020 equivalent. The Matrix leaves clues, people!Â
As for me, I’m sleeping more. For a longtime insomniac, you’d think I’d be glad. Instead, I take it as a sign of depression crawling in. I’m less productive. I play a lot of Boggle and Scrabble. However, my sainted wife (AKA She Who Must Be Obeyed) is taking this opportunity to paint the bathroom. I don’t want any part of that so I do the dishes and, among several book projects, I work on a prequel to This Plague of Days. I also have a separate book proposal and a dialogue going on with a publisher in New York. I’m assuming that’s on hold indefinitely as we all figure this shit out.
This circumstance has elevated workers that society often takes for granted. They’re literally risking their health for others. I hope that esteem for workers in the food delivery chain continues long after the Corona Crisis is over. Doctors, nurses, researchers, scientists, truckers, delivery people, grocery store workers: they’re all on the frontline and we should all be grateful. (When all this is over, I plan to send a gift basket to my doctor’s office.)
Bright spots amid the dark chaos bring light. Today I watched two police cars roll up in a backstreet of Majorca. A bunch of cops poured out of their cruisers and started singing and dancing, playing guitars to elevate people’s spirits. They played as people joined in from their windows above the street. As I witnessed good people working to make the best of a bad situation, I wept.
Compassion moves me. Heroism moves me. Rising to the occasion inspires me to try to do the same. This is the only thing to love about the pandemic: The virus has shown us our weakness, but through this horror, we will plumb undiscovered strengths. Smart people will find a vaccine. We have to be patient and strive to not become patients.
Stupid people will stand in the way on our road back to health. We must work around them. We must believe there are many more good humans than bad. Good people will get us through this.
Wherever you are, stay as safe as you can, share funny pet videos, help somebody, reach out electronically so no one gets too lonely, read, goof off, goof around, laugh and take care of yourself and your family. Persevere.
Don’t just survive. Live to thrive.
*Some of my readers may be unfamiliar with the term sugar bush. It’s mostly a Canadian thing where you go to a maple plantation to eat too many pancakes, baked beans, slaw and several variations of maple syrup. The gift shop sells maple candy and maple syrup, of course. If the weather’s right, you can take a horse-drawn sleigh into the woods to see how the sap is tapped from maple trees. You can even pour maple syrup on the snow, freeze it, and eat it off a popsicle stick. Afterward, the tradition was to take the kids to check out the farm’s rabbits, pigs, and cows. Maybe by this time next year, it will be safe to do that again. I look forward to the party when all this is over.
